Parenting Resources!

Parenting Resources

(updated October 2017)

I hope these add value to you and your family.  I trust these resources wholeheartedly.  If you have suggestions email them to me so I can check them out.  I am continually looking for excellent resources that help us serve our families with excellence.  Let me know if I can serve your family in any way.

Dr. Gilbert

Family Life – Passport to Purity  & on Amazon Passport to Purity 

  • This is a must for every parent and child – Ages 10+.  It is an amazing time of bonding.  It takes some preparation, but is all planned out for you.  Go prepared.  Enjoy the growth in you relationship with your son or daughter from this getaway.

 

Jim Burns

  • Ages 3-5 – God Made Your Body
  • Ages 6-9 – How God Makes Babies
  • Teaching Your Children Healthy Sexuality
  • The Purity Code: God’s Plan for Sex and Your Body

Kevin Leman

  • A Chicken’s Guide to Talking Turkey About Sex

protectyoungminds.org

Stan & Brenna Jones – Christian Sex Ed

  • Ages 3-5 (Book 1) The Story of Me
  • Ages 5-8 (Book 2) Before I Was Born
  • Ages 8-11 (Book 3) What’s the Big Deal?: Why God Care About Sex
  • Ages 13-14 (Book 4) Facing the Facts: The Truth About Sex & You

HealingLives.com

 

 

Learn about my Presentation at the American Association of Christian Counselors (AACC) World Conference in this Article on Corban University’s Website

Article Links:

https://t.co/J0PQCbCsUN

https://www.corban.edu/news/2017/10/05/what-corban-professors-have-been-part-3-dr-corey-gilbert

What Corban professors have been up to: Part 3, Dr. Corey Gilbert

Thursday, 5 October 2017
Dr. Corey Gilbert, Associate Professor of Psychology at Corban University, might not have much in common with Salt-N-Pepa, the American hip-hop trio, but he would heartily agree with them on at least one point: “Let’s talk about sex.” Just last month, Dr. Gilbert presented at the American Association of Christian Counselors (AACC) World Conference in Nashville, Tennessee. His topic? “Sex and the Millennial: Transformative Conversations that Integrate Research and Theology.”

How did Dr. Gilbert come to present at the AACC conference?

Dr. Gilbert had attended the AACC World Conference for years—since he was a grad student in the 90s, in fact. But he hadn’t actually presented until now. “I had wanted to do this for years, but it is amazing the power of FEAR,” he writes in his blog. But this year he had finally submitted a handful of proposals related to the conference’s annual theme, “Break Every Chain.” Not only was his proposal on “Sex and the Millennial” accepted, but it received a great deal of interest leading up to the conference and was one of the few breakout sessions labeled full on the registration page. Indeed, Dr. Gilbert ended up speaking to a packed house of about 160.

Why “Sex and the Millennial?” What’s critical about this age group and conversations about sex?  

Dr. Gilbert has witnessed first-hand the attitudes Christian millennials have toward sex, both through his career as a Licensed Professional Counselor and as Associate Professor of Psychology at Corban University, where he teaches courses such as Human Sexuality, Trauma Therapy, Counseling Skills, Psychology of Addiction, and Abnormal Psychology. Although the topics he discusses with his students in these courses are often uncomfortable ones, Dr. Gilbert is adamant that being open about difficult topics, especially under the guidance of godly mentors, is crucial to young people’s development.

And indeed, “Millennials want and need to talk about sex,” Dr. Gilbert explains in a summary of his presentation. “How they think about sex impacts them spiritually, behaviorally, relationally, emotionally, and neurologically. The decisions they make during the critical young adult years (ages 18-28) impact them for decades.”

The problem lies in where millennials are receiving their information about this topic. Although each generation has struggled with harmful attitudes toward sex, millennials have access to portals of information that earlier generations did not, including the internet and social media. Too often, young people turn to sources of information that are inaccurate or even harmful (e.g. social media and friends), instead of biblically-grounded sources.

Where does “Research” enter the discussion? What kind of research did Dr. Gilbert conduct?

For more than a decade, Dr. Gilbert has been collecting data. Both in his Human Sexuality course at Corban and in an equivalent course he’s taught for another private Christian university, Dr. Gilbert has administered a survey to his students at the beginning of each semester. The survey asks students to honestly and anonymously answer questions about their attitude toward sex, where they’ve learned about sex, their comfort level talking to their parents about sex, and other related questions.

For years, the data had been piling up, unused. “Two years ago,” says Dr. Gilbert, “a colleague of mine pushed me to do something with it.” Dr. Gilbert asked one of his student assistants, Danielle Horne, to begin compiling the data from the surveys. Danielle began to analyze some of the data and ended up presenting her findings at the National Conference on Undergraduate Research in April of 2016. Her presentation was titled “Safe Sex: A Study on the Influences on Sexual Decision-Making.” She concluded that a young person’s comfort-level talking with their parents about sex had an impact on whether or not they would make safe decisions. The higher the comfort level, the more likely they would turn to their parents to talk about sex, and the less risky their behavior would be. “It is the parent’s job to create an environment in the home where their children feel comfortable talking about sex,” Danielle concluded. The idea of parental responsibility became a key point in Dr. Gilbert’s presentation.

What about “Theology”? What role did Scripture play in this discussion? 

Dr. Gilbert’s discussion on parental involvement dovetailed with an analysis of Proverbs 6:20-23:

My son, obey your father’s commands,
and don’t neglect your mother’s instruction.

Keep their words always in your heart.
Tie them around your neck.

When you walk, their counsel will lead you.
When you sleep, they will protect you.
When you wake up, they will advise you.

For their command is a lamp and their instruction a light;
their corrective discipline is the way to life.

He pointed out that this passage, in the context of warning young people away from sexual immorality, underlines the importance of parents in a young person’s decisions about sex—similar to Danielle’s conclusions. He points out that parents’ counsel, commands, instruction, and discipline come together to protect their children from unhealthy decisions regarding sex.

So… What’s the takeaway?

Both research and Scripture point to the importance of wise adults speaking into young people’s lives. Ultimately, Dr. Gilbert points out that parents, church leaders, and other Christian adults can’t afford to be silent on the topic of sexuality. Rather, their role is to counsel, command, instruct, and discipline young people. Evidence shows that, when communicated effectively in a way that makes young people comfortable, a parent’s input and involvement has a significant impact on a young person’s behavior, and can become more influential than powerful voices such as social media and the internet. Speaking to pastoral and professional counselors, coaches, church leaders, and others working in the field of young adult and family mental health, Dr. Gilbert urged them, “Be a wise voice in this conversation; don’t be silent.”

Dr. Gilbert hosts a blog and online resource called “Healing Lives,” whose mission is “to provide church leaders, young adults, moms, and dads with practical tools, teaching, resources, and guidance on matters of a biblical sexual ethic for their churches, families, and lives.”

Please Distribute this Survey for Parents from Dr. Gilbert

Hi there mom or dad.  I want to ask you for some feedback.  Answer any of the following questions if you are willing so that I may better serve those like you that are in that stage of life of raising children/preteens/teens.  Thank you in advance for your input and vulnerability.  I am honored. Follow me at HealingLives.com – more resources will be available soon.

Click here for Survey: https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/5KQPXBS

Thanks for your responses.  I am looking forward to working with your answers and addressing these topics very soon.

Respectfully,

Dr. Gilbert

Questions for Parents, Help me out – so I can help you!

Hi there mom or dad.  I want to ask you for some feedback.  Answer any of the following questions if you are willing so that I may better serve those like you that are in that stage of life of raising children/preteens/teens.  Thank you in advance for your input and vulnerability.  I am honored. Email me your responses or respond on my blog page @ HealingLives.com   (email: drgilbert@healinglives.com)

  1. What is the hardest part of raising boys or girls when dealing with the topic of sex?
  2. What is your biggest fear about addressing anything around the topic of sex with your children/preteens/teens?
  3. What tools or needs do you have to feel better prepared to address the topic of sex and sexuality with your children?
  4. At what age do you feel you should start these conversations?
  5. Who is more comfortable talking about sex and babies and body changes with your children – husband or wife?  Who should be doing it?
  6. When and how do you address the topic of pornography with your sons?  and daughters?
  7. What are your limits and what are your struggles with devices (phones, tablets)?
  8. What permissions and/or limitations do you make or feel like you should make for social media with your preteens/teens?
  9. What other questions do you have that you might want to ask a counselor (that’s me)?
  10. How can I serve you as you serve your family well?

Thanks for your emails and responses.  I am looking forward to working with your answers and addressing these topics very soon.

Respectfully,

Dr. Gilbert

Speaking at the AACC World Conference Sept 2017

What an amazing honor it was to speak in a break out session at the American Association of Christian Counselors (AACC) World Conference in Nashville, TN yesterday (September 30th, 2017).  There were over 7000 counselors and pastors in attendance.  I have wanted to do this for years but it is amazing the power of FEAR.

I showed up very early and setup (yesterday Sept 30th) to speak.  What followed was an incredible experience – it was energizing, exciting, and I absolutely loved the opportunity.

Numerous things happened that blew my mind:

  • As the time neared an old friend from my Seminary days showed up – what an honor to get reacquainted.
  • A counselor and leader Dr Corey Allan from Sexy Marriage Radio and Simple Marriage attended – we had met a few days prior via a conversation with Shannon Etheridge I had about my research and upcoming presentation.
  • My boss and Corban University‘s provost Mike Patterson attended – what an honor that was to see him in attendance.
  • A very dear professor from my Seminary days in the 90’s attended, Dr Scott Floyd – now serving at B.H. Carroll Institute in Texas.
  • An amazing surprise was Dr Doug Rosenau’s attendance.  He has been a mentor via the Institute of Sexual Wholeness for 15 years.  He even stood up at the end and spoke – what an honor.
  • My best attendee’s were my former students Mariana Scutaru and Inna Cubara (and sister) from my days as a professor in Georgia.  I am so proud of them and all God is doing in their lives since they graduated.
  • We also had a packed house – the room sat 160+ and it was full.

I began quite nervous (my former students said they could tell when I loosened up and relaxed). What an honor to serve – share parts of my story, and discuss sex and the millennial and what we need to do – what we must do.  I also had the privilege of presenting the research from two former students Dani Horne, and Nathaniel Cheney.

Feel free to go to my previous post and download my PowerPoint in PDF format.  Let me know of you have any questions.

Corey Gilbert, PhD, LPC
Eph 3:20 “…exceedingly abundantly…”

 

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