Men – How to Marry Well

Kevin Leman says that “Sex Begins in the Kitchen.”  Les and Leslie Parrott talk about “Saving Your Marriage Before it Starts.”  Greg and Erin Smalley say that “Before you Plan Your Wedding…Plan Your Marriage.”

These are incredible resources for the man or woman wanting to MARRY WELL.  What I am finding as a professional counselor and family life coach is that most men will not read these books.  So how can we educate men on key issues they need to watch for, pay attention to, and be aware of – both personally, and in a future wife?  

A Brief Summary:

  • Men, Be Intentional.  Create, know, and live by an Ethos that honors others.  This goes for how you talk to a woman, touch, look at, etc.  
  • Sex is about relationship, not a thing you do.  You are a sexual being. This is to be stewarded and guarded.  Doing so saves so much fear, headache and heartache.  There are no scares or need to seek medical attention for a potential disease or pregnancy.  
  • Men, what kind of marriage and family and home life do you want?  Know the answer to that.  Have a vision for your future.  Discuss this with others and refine and mature this vision – in community.  
  • Do not live together!  This is a critical one for marital success.  
  • Kill your porn consumption.  This, for many healthy wives is nearly as bad as cheating.  Learn to live without this junk NOW!  Don’t wait until you are married – I guarantee you will bring it into your habits in marriage if you do not kill it now.    
  • Be active in your local church – not just attending.  Use your skills and talents to serve those in need.  This shows a potential life-partner that you are more about others than yourself.  
  • Be making a difference in your community – serve in scouts or athletics or in some way that impacts your community and makes where you live a better place.  

Follow these men and you will be very attractive to the healthy women in you world.  Go now and make your world a better place!

TO find out more about how to do this – check out my online course on “Love, Sex, Dating, & Marriage with Dr G” by clicking here.  

To work on Building a strong er Sexual Ethic and diving deeper into this part of who you are – join my membership site (opening soon) by going to 

Dr. G

The Decline of Play & Increase in Mental Health Concerns

We ought not be surprised.  But, we MUST do something about it though.  Our children need us to be stronger than technology and media and the culture and lead them well.  What does this look like?

  • Get them playing.
  • Let then handle the disagreements without our immediate intervention.
  • Get them outside.
  • Decrease media usage and teach them the “why.”
  • Model play for them (we might need to loosen up).
  • Create space in and outside of our home for play.
  • Empower children at all ages to set goals and achieve wins (and experience losses).

Encourage children to be WHOLE people – physical health, spiritual depth, emotional stability, a strong work ethic, and community.

Dr. G

Book a Speaking Engagement Today!

“If it takes a village, the contemporary village is social media and the village sex-ed instructor is porn.”

News from so many sources can be overwhelming and even misleading.  We want to believe what fits with our worldview.  The reality of teens and tweens and their sex lives is that they ACTUALLY HAVE ONE!  This ought to be a rude awakening to parents.

Young people’s definition of S-E-X is becoming more and more personal and subjective in an attempt to accommodate their personal reality while avoiding guilt and shame (with little success).  Science twists the truth.  Churches tend to avoid the truth.  Families even suppress the truth.  Our culture screams for and elevates personal happiness and expression over other’s wellbeing and over deep relationships.  Teens are sexting.  Teens are giving and receiving oral sex like it has no consequence.  Anal sex is occurring more and more frequently without consideration of the impact this has on anyone’s health (and it does).  And again, parents avoid the hard stuff and avoid asking hard questions.

The conclusion of this article is that teens are “resilient.”  Really, we are going to just shrug our shoulders at the pain and shame and hurt and fear and degradation happening right before us – even in our own homes between our children?  NO WAY!  I don’t want my child to be “resilient” for resiliency’s sake.  I want them to learn from others and avoid so many of these pitfalls that later impact their health, marriages, communication skills, boundaries, friendships, faith, and overall wellbeing.

Join me as we build a community of like-minded men and women that see a biblical sexual ethic as a critical component of raising the next generation.  Find out more soon at

Shame!     Fear!     Betrayal!     Lust!     Adulterer!     Idolator!

Are you and I these things?  God tells us NO!  We are His BELOVED!  He loves us with wild passion.  God pursues us to tell us He DELIGHTS in us!  This film will take you on a roller coaster ride through testimonies and a glimpse into the story of the Prodigal Son.  God has prepared the way for us.  He is in our darkest places and experiences.  He never leaves us nor forsakes us.  Dr. Dan Allender and team present a beautifully intricate story about God’s desire to REDEEM!   He is our Redeemer.  He Delights in you.  He woos you!  YOU are HIS Beloved!

Check it out soon –

Dr. Gilbert